PS4 101; How To Not Find an Evil Version of Yourself Across Dimensions
I saw the terrifying castle of Evil Me in the distance. Reid and I trembled as we got closer. The path became more treacherous the closer we got. I thought of giving up, but I remembered Retep’s words. “I believe in you!”
I should back up. (The story, not myself.)
Chapter 1: Introduction
My name is Peter Kleisner. I’m a normal sixth grader. My mom is an amazing person, and so is my brother. Reid Jackson is my best friend (and closest ally.) He’s a fourth grader who doesn’t have that great of a brother (Sorry Griff!). We had some pretty normal lives, that was, until the PS4 started humming.
Chapter 2: What the…?
The PS4 suddenly jolted off. It made the both of us jump. I looked at it and said, “Will’s gonna be sooooo mad.”
Reid replied, “Oh come on! It’s probably not that bad!” He said as he walked over to me.
“Oooh. It IS that bad.” I started panicking because the PS4 was not turning on and it was smoking.
“OH JEEZ OH CRAP OH JEEZ OH CRAP!” I said, running in circles.
Reid slapped me and said, “THIS ISN’T HELPING PETER! We need to come clean.”
“WILLANDMOMOAREOUTOFTOWNRIGHTNOWANDWON’TBEBACKFOR78HOURS!” I said, all in one breath.
“Well darn it. How can we get the PS4 fixed?” Reid said. Then an idea popped into my head.
Chapter 4: The Idea Worked.
I quickly ran upstairs and looked around for the thing I was looking for. I fished around for it, but I found it. My homemade Portal Gun. Reid came up the stairs.
“Peter, this isn’t time for playing!”
I replied, “Who says science is playing?” I turned on the lights on it and shot it at the wall. I had closed my eyes while shooting it. I opened them and saw a flabbergasted Reid staring…at the portal on the wall.
Chapter 5: Baby’s First Portal
I walked over to the portal, and put my hand through it. I felt… grapes? I pulled a grape the size of my head out of the portal. “Ooo!” Reid came over and devoured it instantly. I wondered what else we could find. I tweaked around with the knob and got another portal going. A huge tentacle popped out and tried to grab me! Reid did some quick thinking and slapped it. It whimpered and retreated back into the portal.
“Okay, now ‘it’ is gone, what are we supposed to do?” Reid questioned.
I replied with a short, but sweet, “I don’t have the foggiest idea.” Reid went limp on my bed and groaned,
“Just Faaaaaaaaaaaaan – flipping – tastic.” I fiddled the knob again, but the little blue light on it spelled (84(15890-3) which meant backwards dimension. I shot the portal on the floor, grabbed the still groaning Reid by the arm, and hopped right on in.
Chapter 6: Where In God’s Name Are We?
We flew out of the portal and landed in the grass. “MMMMPHHH!” I heard Reid say. I took my face out of the dirt and looked around. I saw… Black trees? I looked down at the grass. It was BLACK. I thought, wow, I wonder how chlorophyll looks in this dimension! But I needed to stay focused. I looked around then picked up Reid. We walked around a bit and found the town of Hydel.
Reid said, “What is this? Like, Hyrule from Zelda?”
I slapped him and said, “HYDEL. It’s Delhi backwards.”
We walked in and found a big city instead of a small town. “Woah!” We said in unison. We walked around a bit and found a Sony Store. We high-fived and walked in. We went up to the counter and the receptionist greeted us.
“Welcome Dimension Hoppers! My name is Anit, how may I help you today?” I talked to her about the problem and she said
“Ah. we’ve been getting a lot of those. Go talk to Dier and Retep and they’ll know what to do.”
“Dier and Retep?”
“Yes! The creators of the PS4!”
“Happy to help!”
Reid and I walked out and squealed. We ran over to the place Anit told us to go. Their house was on an island.
“Probably so they don’t get mobbed,” Reid guessed. We looked around on the dock for a boat, but nothing was there. “Ooh, Tim’s Boat Shop is just a teleport away!” So we touched the ad in the newspaper Reid was holding, and we were there! So we went up to the register and said, “One speedboat please!” The teenager at the counter said. “Ugh. I can’t be bothered to use the register. Have it for free. It’s out back.” She handed me the keys and we sprinted outside and got the speedboat. We teleported back and sped to the Mansion!
Chapter 7: Our Story Has Just Begun
We came to a halt at the dock. I parked the boat and knocked on the door. Retep opened the door. “Uh… Dier? You’re gonna want to see this.” Dier came over and saw us. It was us, but green and with three eyes instead of two. Retep had glasses, but for three eyes. We walked in and Dier shut the door. Retep and I had a very long discussion about what happened and how we got here, while Reid and Dier were chatting it through too.
“Well, me and Dier think that it’s Evil Peter.”
“ARE YOU FLIPPING SERIOUS RETEP?!”
“Yeah. But all stories gotta have a bad guys right? Plus it’s in the title.”
“Oh yeah. Forgot about that.”
“Anyways.” Retep continued, “You’ll need these.” He handed me an enchirito with moldy cheese and purple gunk, and Dier handed Reid a cookie. Reid devoured it but I hesitated at first and finally ate it. A bunch of power surged through me at once. I felt… Powerful. I could control my powers that surged through me. I could control my farts, which became very deadly.
Reid had elements like water, fire, earth, and electricity. Retep handed me a slim but powerful sword. “The P Mister Sword (Pee Miy-ster sord)” He called it. Dier handed Reid a powerful Morning Star. “Now go and Kick Evil Peter right in his stupid face!” Dier yelled. “I believe in you Peter!” Retep encouraged. They waved goodbye, and just like that, we were in the portal and going to Evil Peter.
Chapter 8: HERE WE GOOOOO!
We jumped out at the right time, landing without eating dirt. We started walking to his castle. I saw the terrifying castle of Evil Me in the distance. Reid and I trembled as we got closer. The path became more treacherous the closer we got. I thought of giving up, but I remembered Retep’s words. “I believe in you Peter!” That made me feel really better, but we were at the castle gate. Reid saw an open window and jumped in. He opened the gate from the inside.
There I saw the man himself. He started slow clapping. “Bravo, Bravo. You came ALL this way to get your beloved PS4 back. Sorry the journey wasn’t worth it.” He started coming at me with a sword of his own. Reid dashed at him and knocked him back.
“OW! YOU PEASANT!” He used some sort of magic to throw Reid around.
“HEY! You can’t do that to my friend! HYAAAA!” But as I swung at him. Evil Reid came in and said, “Nope.” and blocked me with his dagger. Reid came in with a shocking waterball, knocking out Evil Reid.
“NOOOO! CURSE MY STUPID HENCHMAN!” EP yelled. He locked Reid in some sort of shadow cage. He came at me with a deafening blow giving me a bloody gash on my leg that stung like crazy. “And now, IT’S GAME OVER FOR YOU PETER!” He slashed his sword right into my skull, killing me instantly. “NOOOOO!” Reid screamed.
Chapter 9: Nah, it’s not game over, I’ve got 2 lives left!
I woke up in purgatory. I saw the stairway to heaven and the rollercoaster to hell. At the stairway, I saw a familiar skeleton in a black hoodie.
“Hey Peter,” Death said.
“Hey dood.” I replied.
“I’m sorry you had to die like that bro.”
“You shouldn’t have died. Tell ya what, if you give me an organ, I’ll let you come back to life!”
“Howzabout my second heart?”
“Sure, that’ll work.”
He reached into my ghostly chest and pulled out my second heart that I had at birth (It’s a very rare medical condition!), and I flew up.
Chapter 10: The End
I looked and saw EP standing, turned away from my corpse. I took this as my chance and stabbed him in the heart with my sword, which was still in my grasp.
He chuckled. “Lucky… Shot…” he said, before he collapsed on the ground, dead. I let out a victory screech, while Reid came over and high-fived. We got a portal going, this time to home, and jumped in. When we got back, the PS4 was fixed. It all worked out in the end! And yes, this was over the course of 2 days.